Thursday, December 15, 2011

Fantasy Final Four - Semifinals Preview

1. El Jefe - Jeff (10-3)
vs
6. Tebowner - Sandeep (8-6)

Sandeep lucked into his 76 - 72 victory over Sammy thanks to Tim's Monday Night comeback on him in Rivalry Week 13, which dropped him down to the lower (ha!) Sixth Seed. Despite not waking up in time to replace the inactive Adrian Peterson in his starting lineup, the newest Nor Cal Valley Boy happened to play against the one team that scored less than his in Week 14. Even though he probably deserves to be eliminated this year, Sandeep's first playoff win has been a long time coming after being eliminated in the playoffs with scores of 101 and 107.

Unfortunately, Sandeep's reward for the cheap playoff win is a date with his old pal Jeff, whose team is coming off a record shattering season. El Jefe put up a terrifying 150 points in his bye week, and is fully capable of sustaining that level of scoring as we have all witnessed throughout the regular season. That being said, Sandeep only needs to beat him once, and may be equipped with some favorable matchups to do so. Jeff's team will kick off first on Thursday Night with Roddy White, while Sandeep will have Miles Austin and Jason Witten get it started for him on the first Saturday Night game of the season at Tampa Bay. Sandeep's Adrian Peterson will host Jeff's Drew Brees, while his Broncos will host Jeff's Patriot studs Wes Welker and Rob Gronkowsi. Jeff will close the day on SNF with Ryan Mathews. If this is still somehow close heading into Monday Night, we're in for some stupid fun as each fantasy team has a kicker in the Steelers at 49ers game, but Sandeep may have the edge for once with Mike Wallace as well.

Can the Dancing Midget topple El Jefe... or will Jeff begin his quest to become our first No.1 seed to win it all?


2. Everybody Loves Rice - Albert (9-4)
vs
5. The Crazy Commish - Vishal (8-6)

Your Commish is undefeated in all (one of) his playoff matchups! The showdown with the Jew was a wild up and down roller coaster ride, starting on Thursday and ending on Sunday Night Football:

Up: Injury to Big Ben
Down: Big Ben somehow returns at the Half, scores 17, and the Steelers D drops 16. 33-0 heading into the weekend.
Up: Owen Daniels somehow doubles the Arian Foster's point total.
Down: Daniels does not catch the game winner in that game, while MJD scores his FOURTH touchdown seconds later.
Up: Matt Ryan finishes with 28 points, his best performance of the season and Frank Gore limps off the field to start the late games.
Down: Frank Gore returns and scores a touchdown.
Up: Larry Fitzgerald (acquired in the CJ trade) takes over the game and Mike Bush gets a garbage touchdown, resulting in a kosher tirade of swearing on gchat. Mike's takes a 109-102 lead into SNF, but has no players left while I have two.
Down: Ahmad Bradshaw is benched for the first half of SNF.
Up: Dez Bryant hauls in a 50-yard touchdown, winning the epic showdown for yours truly 113-109.

The Commish left Toby Gerhart's 16 points on the bench and the Jew left Marques Colston's 22 points on the bench, so you can only imagine the anguish that caused us both. I shouldn't speak for white people, but I can honestly say that was one of the most enjoyable Sundays I have ever had. THIS is why we play this gut wrenching game of fantasy football, boys.

Whew. Now onto this upcoming week. Even after moving across the country, the ultimate friendly rivalry lives on. Although Albert leads 5-2 in our all-time series, this is by far the most significant matchup we have had. This matchup may very well be decided before Sunday, as your Commish is doubling up on the Falcons and Cowboys: Thursday Night with Matt Ryan and Michael Turner hosting the Jaguars and Saturday Night with Dez Bryant and waiver wire pickup Felix Jones at Tampa Bay. Of course, Albert is doubling up on the Cowboys too with Tony Romo and Dan Bailey. Albert's Ray Rice with close the weekend on Sunday Night Football. And in the most ironic twist, I will be starting the Ravens Defense while Al will start the Seahawks Defense. Fitting, no?

Will the Commish's wild ride continue... or is Albert destined to face his rapist Jeff with the championship on the line?